[He lets Azul have that moment, shifting just enough to keep him from being seen by anyone walking by. Jecht can't help thinking back to the time he watched Tidus cry as he said he hated him.
That's okay, son... I hate me, too.
Something that hasn't changed much, even during his time spent with everyone, just before he wound up here. He misses them. All of them, but especially Tidus, Yuna, and Auron.
Jecht remains quiet, keeping his gaze averted; he is alright pretending to see nothing.]
[When the sobbing comes to an end, Azul finds himself utterly exhausted. His hands had drawn away from his face to hug his legs tight; a poor replacement for the embrace of another.
He gives a pathetic sniff, arm coming up to wipe across his face. Then there's a pause as he pulls the arm away, glancing around with a frown... and then giving a heavy sigh.
He brings his head back to rest against the wall, gaze finally falling on Jecht, a softened frown on his face. After a couple more moments, he closes his eyes.]
[A soft half-hearted chuckle is the only response, at first. It's just a sort of awkward sound meant to make it clear he heard and acknowledges the thanks.]
When I first got here, I was so damn surprised. Me... an Initiate? Heh. I thought the one in charge here was just crazy. Now, I know... he is crazy, but how's that any different from some of the shit we're forced through by our lives, back home? [He gives Azul a warm smile, the tiredness in his gaze doing nothing to weaken it.] You can't blame the death of an entire forest on yourself, just because you chose to continue using paper.
[With that, he moves to crouch just a little closer, one hand holding the kid's glasses out for him to take. His other hand very gently ruffles Azul's hair.]
None of us can pick the kind of life we're forced into, but we can choose to make even a single moment better for somebody else.
[Azul still doesn't understand it. How people can give such warm smiles for a complete stranger. And for a man who looks half-Beastman, he'd expect it even less. But he looks back into those eyes, and feels himself relaxing a bit. Feeling a bit... safe, perhaps? ... well, given the guy had every chance to take advantage of him or mistreat him and he didn't...
There's no more skittishness at all towards Jecht's movements. The glasses do get a surprised look, but he makes a little noise of gratitude as he reaches out and takes them...
And then he pauses as his hair is ruffled, gaze coming up to briefly look at Jecht, bewildered, as if the man had just done the strangest thing in the world.
But as he draws back, puts on his glasses and brings up a hand to fix his hair, he also glances sidelong, feeling his cheeks warm just a bit.]
What is it with you people...?
[Why such softness and kindness, especially right after he'd been so belligerent towards Jecht? What was the point of it?]
The best man I ever knew... Braska. I... used to think he was just some naive goodie-two-shoes.
Back when I met him, I... still had a drinking problem. Hell, it was the worst it'd ever been, back then. But, I'd washed up on some strange land, with no idea how I got there. And I refused to believe I was actually in another world...[He sighs.] Anyway, Braska and his Guardian, Auron... They showed up outta nowhere.
While Braska wanted me to join them, Auron was pretty much questioning his sanity. Rightfully so, of course. But, at the time, I was just desperate to find a way back home. Braska made some promises, Auron reluctantly went along with it... So, I agreed. I became his Guardian, as well. Along the way, we talked about things. And...
Turned out... his path wasn't all that different from mine. Before we met, he was treated like some lost cause, and all because he married an Al Bhed. [Since Azul won't know:] The people of Spira considered Al Bhed to be the worst kind of people. And Braska had not only married an Al Bhed... he had a kid with her, and everything. Four years after that... his wife was killed, during an attack on their city.
After everything, Braska had every reason to hate the entire world. Instead... he chose a path that would give the world peace, even for a little while. A world his daughter, Yuna, could be safe in. He gave up everything to save a world that hated him at the time...
[He goes quiet for a moment.]
Not everyone who seems good is good... You just gotta remember it works in reverse, too. You never know when just one act of kindness... or that single chance you give someone... [He shrugs both shoulders, a small grin on his lips.] Could change your life for the better.
Braska and Auron... If not for those guys I would've likely died in some jail cell, drunk and bitter and... all alone. Instead, I got to help give the world ten more years of peace. Then... as a result, Yuna was able to give it an Eternal Calm.
[Azul is quiet throughout the story. Once he starts, his gaze goes to the man, and it never leaves once.
At the end of it, he gives a soft hum, gaze going to the ceiling as he thinks on it for awhile.
And then:]
For someone who participated in such a grand achievement, you don't carry yourself that way.
[A brief, almost teasing sort of smirk, before the expression fades and he gives a sigh, waving his hand.]
Back where I'm from, that sort of attitude was sooner to make you a prime target for all sorts of manipulation and mistreatment. At best, your act of kindness would sooner be forgotten. There are very few you'd meet who don't have some ulterior motive when it comes to such generosity— most usually in a trade that was greatly in their favor.
[He gives a puff, head leaning back against the wall again as he closes his eyes, a wry smirk coming to his lips.]
...granted, things have been different since my death.
Given the cost of it was the death of my best friends, the loss of my humanity, and the hatred from my own son... I think I'm doin' pretty well. [He returns that smirk with one of his own, despite the initial words.] Besides... what would carrying myself like some arrogant dick even do? Nobody here's from Spira, so all everyone else would see is somebody in need of being knocked down a few pegs.
I like a good fight just as much as the next guy. But, I'm way too old and way too tired to consider anybody else's opinion of me significant.
[He shakes his head.]
That sounds a lot, to me, like nearly everyone there's using one another's actions as an excuse to be cruel and untrustworthy. Which... in the end, means they're letting other people determine the kind of person they'll be. And that's... kind of depressing, when you really think about it.
[Jecht slowly moves to stand. Offering his hand in case Azul needs help standing.]
You've been through a lot today. Why not take it easy for now? We can talk more tomorrow.
That is a pretty steep price to pay. [He agrees with that, gesturing with a hand.] But one not need be arrogant to hold themselves confidently.
[Franky comes to mind. A terrifyingly confident woman, if he says so himself. Yet for all her strictness, he'd been treated with nothing but respect.
The thoughts make his stomach churn a bit, and he quickly abandons the train of thought.
The words that come after have him giving a faintly curious look.]
Is it?
[It's clear Azul dcoesn't think so. To him, that was "normal". A fact of life that he'd grown to accept and work with.
He looks at the hand for a moment, then reaches out, accepting the offer, taking a deep breath as he's helped up.]
Mm. [A sound of affirmation. He still needs to find Jamil anyway.] One more question before we part— that person I ran into... a tall man with red hair and a beard, with something of a rough look about him? Do they fit that description?
I've got more than enough muscle and height that I don't need anyone to anticipate the ass-kicking I'm capable of. False insecurity is plenty useful, and... gentleness has its place, too.
[He very gently taps Azul's forehead with a single knuckle.]
You've got a lot of learnin' ahead of ya. And that's just fine. Running out of things to learn would only make life boring. Not that you've got much to worry about. [That's said with a hint of teasing as he ruffles Azul's hair.] In my near-sixty-years, I'm still learnin' a lot.
[He doesn't seem entirely convinced it's completely false, but maybe that just means Jecht's a really good actor.
There's a blink and slight movement back with his head when he's tapped, cheeks faintly warming. Why?? So much touch?
And then there's a hair ruffle again, and he can't help but bring up a hand in an attempt to swat Jecht away, head ducking slightly as his cheeks grow hotter.]
Quit that. I'm not some child. [HUFF!! He crosses his arms.] And yes. We were both on The Barge.
[An aggrieved sigh.]
He's always been... prickly, but I've never seen him this volatile before.
[He chuckles at the swatting, relenting just a bit.]
Nobody said you are.
[Jecht quietly considers Azul's words.]
This place has a way of unearthing anyone's dark side. The one in charge likes a bit of... mayhem, if you will. He sees dying as a good thing, so he's always happy to let anyone's violent side take the wheel.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
regna![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
(no subject)
Date: 2022-08-02 04:04 pm (UTC)That's okay, son... I hate me, too.
Something that hasn't changed much, even during his time spent with everyone, just before he wound up here. He misses them. All of them, but especially Tidus, Yuna, and Auron.
Jecht remains quiet, keeping his gaze averted; he is alright pretending to see nothing.]
(no subject)
Date: 2022-08-02 05:37 pm (UTC)He gives a pathetic sniff, arm coming up to wipe across his face. Then there's a pause as he pulls the arm away, glancing around with a frown... and then giving a heavy sigh.
He brings his head back to rest against the wall, gaze finally falling on Jecht, a softened frown on his face. After a couple more moments, he closes his eyes.]
Thank you for helping me.
[Spoken softly, formally, but sincerely.]
(no subject)
Date: 2022-08-04 12:09 am (UTC)When I first got here, I was so damn surprised. Me... an Initiate? Heh. I thought the one in charge here was just crazy. Now, I know... he is crazy, but how's that any different from some of the shit we're forced through by our lives, back home? [He gives Azul a warm smile, the tiredness in his gaze doing nothing to weaken it.] You can't blame the death of an entire forest on yourself, just because you chose to continue using paper.
[With that, he moves to crouch just a little closer, one hand holding the kid's glasses out for him to take. His other hand very gently ruffles Azul's hair.]
None of us can pick the kind of life we're forced into, but we can choose to make even a single moment better for somebody else.
(no subject)
Date: 2022-08-04 12:25 am (UTC)There's no more skittishness at all towards Jecht's movements. The glasses do get a surprised look, but he makes a little noise of gratitude as he reaches out and takes them...
And then he pauses as his hair is ruffled, gaze coming up to briefly look at Jecht, bewildered, as if the man had just done the strangest thing in the world.
But as he draws back, puts on his glasses and brings up a hand to fix his hair, he also glances sidelong, feeling his cheeks warm just a bit.]
What is it with you people...?
[Why such softness and kindness, especially right after he'd been so belligerent towards Jecht? What was the point of it?]
1/???
Date: 2022-08-04 03:48 am (UTC)"You" people, huh? ... I used to wonder that kinda thing a lot.
[He takes a deep breath, and then he gestures with one hand, vaguely indicating he's about to tell a story.]
2/???
Date: 2022-08-04 03:53 am (UTC)Back when I met him, I... still had a drinking problem. Hell, it was the worst it'd ever been, back then. But, I'd washed up on some strange land, with no idea how I got there. And I refused to believe I was actually in another world...[He sighs.] Anyway, Braska and his Guardian, Auron... They showed up outta nowhere.
While Braska wanted me to join them, Auron was pretty much questioning his sanity. Rightfully so, of course. But, at the time, I was just desperate to find a way back home. Braska made some promises, Auron reluctantly went along with it... So, I agreed. I became his Guardian, as well. Along the way, we talked about things. And...
3/4
Date: 2022-08-04 04:40 am (UTC)Turned out... his path wasn't all that different from mine. Before we met, he was treated like some lost cause, and all because he married an Al Bhed. [Since Azul won't know:] The people of Spira considered Al Bhed to be the worst kind of people. And Braska had not only married an Al Bhed... he had a kid with her, and everything. Four years after that... his wife was killed, during an attack on their city.
4/4
Date: 2022-08-04 04:47 am (UTC)After everything, Braska had every reason to hate the entire world. Instead... he chose a path that would give the world peace, even for a little while. A world his daughter, Yuna, could be safe in. He gave up everything to save a world that hated him at the time...
[He goes quiet for a moment.]
Not everyone who seems good is good... You just gotta remember it works in reverse, too. You never know when just one act of kindness... or that single chance you give someone... [He shrugs both shoulders, a small grin on his lips.] Could change your life for the better.
Braska and Auron... If not for those guys I would've likely died in some jail cell, drunk and bitter and... all alone. Instead, I got to help give the world ten more years of peace. Then... as a result, Yuna was able to give it an Eternal Calm.
(no subject)
Date: 2022-08-04 01:31 pm (UTC)At the end of it, he gives a soft hum, gaze going to the ceiling as he thinks on it for awhile.
And then:]
For someone who participated in such a grand achievement, you don't carry yourself that way.
[A brief, almost teasing sort of smirk, before the expression fades and he gives a sigh, waving his hand.]
Back where I'm from, that sort of attitude was sooner to make you a prime target for all sorts of manipulation and mistreatment. At best, your act of kindness would sooner be forgotten. There are very few you'd meet who don't have some ulterior motive when it comes to such generosity— most usually in a trade that was greatly in their favor.
[He gives a puff, head leaning back against the wall again as he closes his eyes, a wry smirk coming to his lips.]
...granted, things have been different since my death.
(no subject)
Date: 2022-08-04 05:44 pm (UTC)I like a good fight just as much as the next guy. But, I'm way too old and way too tired to consider anybody else's opinion of me significant.
[He shakes his head.]
That sounds a lot, to me, like nearly everyone there's using one another's actions as an excuse to be cruel and untrustworthy. Which... in the end, means they're letting other people determine the kind of person they'll be. And that's... kind of depressing, when you really think about it.
[Jecht slowly moves to stand. Offering his hand in case Azul needs help standing.]
You've been through a lot today. Why not take it easy for now? We can talk more tomorrow.
(no subject)
Date: 2022-08-04 06:44 pm (UTC)[Franky comes to mind. A terrifyingly confident woman, if he says so himself. Yet for all her strictness, he'd been treated with nothing but respect.
The thoughts make his stomach churn a bit, and he quickly abandons the train of thought.
The words that come after have him giving a faintly curious look.]
Is it?
[It's clear Azul dcoesn't think so. To him, that was "normal". A fact of life that he'd grown to accept and work with.
He looks at the hand for a moment, then reaches out, accepting the offer, taking a deep breath as he's helped up.]
Mm. [A sound of affirmation. He still needs to find Jamil anyway.] One more question before we part— that person I ran into... a tall man with red hair and a beard, with something of a rough look about him? Do they fit that description?
(no subject)
Date: 2022-08-09 01:14 am (UTC)I've got more than enough muscle and height that I don't need anyone to anticipate the ass-kicking I'm capable of. False insecurity is plenty useful, and... gentleness has its place, too.
[He very gently taps Azul's forehead with a single knuckle.]
You've got a lot of learnin' ahead of ya. And that's just fine. Running out of things to learn would only make life boring. Not that you've got much to worry about. [That's said with a hint of teasing as he ruffles Azul's hair.] In my near-sixty-years, I'm still learnin' a lot.
[As for the last question...]
Yeah, it does. Someone you know?
(no subject)
Date: 2022-08-09 01:38 am (UTC)[He doesn't seem entirely convinced it's completely false, but maybe that just means Jecht's a really good actor.
There's a blink and slight movement back with his head when he's tapped, cheeks faintly warming. Why?? So much touch?
And then there's a hair ruffle again, and he can't help but bring up a hand in an attempt to swat Jecht away, head ducking slightly as his cheeks grow hotter.]
Quit that. I'm not some child. [HUFF!! He crosses his arms.] And yes. We were both on The Barge.
[An aggrieved sigh.]
He's always been... prickly, but I've never seen him this volatile before.
(no subject)
Date: 2022-08-11 11:58 pm (UTC)Nobody said you are.
[Jecht quietly considers Azul's words.]
This place has a way of unearthing anyone's dark side. The one in charge likes a bit of... mayhem, if you will. He sees dying as a good thing, so he's always happy to let anyone's violent side take the wheel.
(no subject)
Date: 2022-08-13 09:24 pm (UTC)... what a nightmare.
[He stares at the floor for a moment, then sucks in a breath and shakes his head.]
There's something I need to do... but thank you, again.
You know my name, but you never gave me yours.
(no subject)
Date: 2022-08-16 05:13 am (UTC)Yeah... guess I was too caught up in everything to remember to tell ya. Name's Jecht, from a world called Spira.
(no subject)
Date: 2022-08-16 05:33 pm (UTC)I'll likely find you again in awhile. Will I be able to message you?
[He knows he has a device that looked somewhat similar to what was on the Barge, but he's not about to assume that it's the exact same.]
(no subject)
Date: 2022-08-18 01:01 am (UTC)[In fact, he sends Azul a message now:]
You've got this.
One step at a time.
1/3
Date: 2022-08-18 02:38 pm (UTC)2/3
Date: 2022-08-18 02:39 pm (UTC)3/3
Date: 2022-08-18 02:39 pm (UTC)You're ridiculous.
[Huffily leaving!]
(no subject)
Date: 2022-08-18 06:33 pm (UTC)And honest!
[Probably way more honest than he should be in this kind of situation, but... he's generally more than powerful enough to handle consequences of it.]